After giving our family calendar a once over earlier this week it became apparent to my wife and I that our eight-year-old son, through no fault of his own, is driving our schedules.
You see we have a sports nut for a child, one that has loved everything that comes with being part of a team since he was three years old.
As someone that grew up just as passionate about sports, only to later make a living as a sports reporter, I have to admit I have been proud to watch our son develop and excel at his two loves – hockey and baseball.
However, as he’s developed, if I may say, into a fine little athlete, this has translated into an exhausting schedule and a non-existent savings account.
Our family has gone without a summer vacation the past three years because of summer hockey and baseball schedules consuming every available weekend.
While most of our friends are off relaxing on some faraway beach or camping in the mountains, our family vacations have become tournaments.
As much as I love sports, trekking to and fro from a hotel room and an arena is not my ideal way to relax. If anything, it’s the total opposite of relaxation.
You return home from a tournament on Sunday evening totally exhausted for the workweek ahead. Sure, there have been great memories, but at what cost?
And as parents we are not alone in sacrificing, as siblings do as well. Our daughter, who has absolutely no interest in hockey, has been, for a majority of her life, dragged along to her younger brother’s practices, games and tournaments.
There are plenty of families that find themselves in this trap, and although some may disagree our daughter will tell you otherwise.
Financially, I calculated we spent upwards of $7,000 last year alone when considering registration costs for hockey and baseball, power skating, training camps, equipment, lodging, fuel, etc. for our then seven-year-old son. Thankfully, he has always appeared to enjoy himself, but if we continue at this rate by the time he turns 18 we will have spent close to a mortgage on his athletic programs alone, not to mention a majority of our memories will be from inside a hockey rink.
I know there are a number of parents spending this amount of money, and some may say they don’t and won’t regret it as it keeps their children off the street and out of trouble. But surely there are more inexpensive ways to keep your child out of trouble without breaking the bank.
We received a telephone call last week from a spring AAA hockey team inviting our son to play. As a parent, it can be difficult to say no when someone has gone out of the way to evaluate and recruit your child over the course of the season. And, of course, as a parent it’s always nice to hear your child “has it”. But when is enough, enough? When do you have to blow the whistle and politely decline an invitation just to get your family life back in order?
We decided not to decide for our son but instead ask him if he wanted to play. Surely the answer was going to be an unequivocal yes. It wasn’t. He said no. He said he wanted to play only baseball until hockey starts up again in the fall. He chose what would make him happy, not what he thought would please mom or dad. It got me thinking, how many other kids out there would make the same decision if given the opportunity? Are kids being overscheduled against their will?
Some argue that over-scheduling in sports can lead to psychological burnout, physical injuries and even turn a child off to physical exercise.
On the other side of the argument, some say competitive sports foster self-discipline, sportsmanship and conflict resolution, not to mention keeps them away from those darn video games.
There is certainly something to be said about moderation. I think as a family we have finally come to the realization that we hit our “too much” and have decided to take a step back and reevaluate what is truly important and necessary.
We will continue to support our children in their decisions to pursue sporting excellence, or whatever else their little hearts desire, however we will be more conscientious of how much time and money is spent and, most importantly, take that well deserved family vacation this summer.
