Well, another Father’s Day is on the horizon.
Unlike birthdays, this special day designated to fathers around the world has a way of making me feel older.
But this one, more than anything else, has also made me appreciate and reflect on how fatherhood has changed for me over the years.
I experienced two moments within days this past weekend that made me realize children are not the only ones who are challenged with adjusting to development stages.
First, my eight-year-old son was faced with the daunting task of pitching against the top team in his league. It was one of those moments where as a father I felt both proud and completely helpless. As gratifying as it was to see him not only doing what he has a passion for, and achieving beyond expectations, there was nothing I could do to help him in that particular moment on the mound if he were to face adversity.
It also made me realize that my little buddy isn’t that little anymore. He is now at an independent stage in his life where he doesn’t need me to take the bull by the horns for him. For the first time in his life, it was him against the world, so to speak.
The other moment was one I have been absolutely dreading since I heard the words, “It’s a girl.”
My 12-year-old daughter had a friend over to the house for the afternoon. It was one of those “friends” of the opposite sex. You know, one of those filthy, stinking pre-pubescent things they call boys. As harmless as it was, and likely will be for a tad bit longer (one can only hope), it’s still a nightmare for any father knowing his daughter has eyes and a heart for another male not named daddy. It can be completely and utterly wounding to say the least.
As a father, you first learn patience and that making mistakes is all part of the fun.
You go from being a baby-carrying, diaper-changing servant to acting like a complete fool for a few cheap laughs.
Then it’s time to teach your children various skills, such as how to read and write, skate, throw a ball, ride a bike, etc. all in the effort to make these little people a much better version of the person you are today.
Gordon Downie of The Tragically Hip may have said it best: “You teach your children some fashion sense, and they fashion some of their own.”
However, what seems like in a blink of an eye, it transitions from what you can do for them to what you can give them, especially with the 12-year-old.
“Dad can you drive me here?”
“Dad can I have $20?”
Rarely do I hear, “Daddy can you play with me?”
Many a father has survived these stages before me, and many more will long after I’m gone, and might chuckle at my griping.
I would not have this any other way, though, as watching these beings I helped to create and develop venture out into this big, bad world to make sound and not so sound decisions is an exciting adventure.
Hopefully one day, if I have done my job correctly, my children will reciprocate and be there for their old man when I ask them, “Hey, kids can you drive me here?” or “Hey kids, can I have $20?” I’ll even let them off the hook with diaper changing (again, one can only hope).
Enjoy the journey boys and have a happy Father’s Day. We deserve it.
