I may have to change the name of my column, seeing on how I broke the actual water cooler at the office earlier this week.
I wasn’t sure at the time if it was just a random occurrence or some sort of spited, mean-spirited, demon-calling omen straight out of a cheesy 1970s horror film. It happened only hours before the scheduled puck drop for the seventh and deciding game between the Vancouver Canucks and the Chicago Blackhawks.
Having no vested interest in this game (this is Flames country, after all, and we can’t cheer for the Canucks) besides having the majority of our Airdrie City View playoff pool participants losing a number of players, I was torn between cheering for the upset and completed comeback, or the best chance for the Stanley Cup to come back to a Canadian team for the first time in 18 years.
Either way, I thought the water cooler disaster could turn into an analogy of Vancouver’s first round series.
The team went into the playoffs as the No. 1 seed in the Western Conference and President’s Trophy winner – everything was looking good. They cruised through the first three games against Chicago, without much push back.
Last week, our cooler was in good working order, too. Then, I’d like to say right around the Blackhawks’ seventh goal in game four, something mysteriously happened to our water supply.
The next morning, we noticed it wasn’t flowing properly. We shrugged it off as a problem with one particular jug. No big deal.
Two days later, when Chicago chased Roberto Luongo for the second straight game, in its 5-0 game five win, the water cooler was showing serious signs of deteriorating performance and we didn’t know why.
What do we do now? Do we replace it with the backup cooler from downstairs? Do we stick with the cooler that kept us hydrated this long?
Unlike Vancouver coach Alain Vignault, the editorial staff decided to display loyalty to its starting goalie. But we had the same result.
After the long weekend, and Chicago’s 3-2 overtime win in game six, we knew all the pressure was on our starting cooler. If it failed one more time, that was it.
Riots in the halls of the City View, changes in management, a long off-season, questions about why we gave our cooler a 12-year contract and a fan base left to ponder how we couldn’t take the next step.
Game 7.
Immense criticism was 60 minutes away.
Good start, as Alex Burrows scores early in the first to put the water cooler up. Great hockey, looking good late. On the power play.
Oh no, Jonathan Toews scores shorthanded with 1:57 left to force overtime. Water cooler showing signs of breaking.
Chelsea Dagger gets queued up during the overtime intermission.
Burrows takes a dumb penalty. Water cooler makes a huge save on Patrick Sharp. Vince Vaughn mumbles “Make me a bicycle, clown” under his breath somewhere.
Chris Campoli makes a terrible clearing attempt. Burrows easily knocks it down, instinctively and immediately remembers the climax of D2: The Mighty Ducks, and fires a knuckle-puck over the right shoulder of Corey Crawford.
A massive sigh of relief is heard from the West Coast. All will be forgotten. Bring on Nashville. That’s all great for Vancouver fans, but our water cooler is still broken.
