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Column: Comparison is the thief of joy, gratitude is the giver

Whether we’re comparing ourselves to others as a source of aspiration or to boost our confidence, it can sometimes be detrimental to our health.

We live in a culture that urges us to make constant comparisons with those around us, exacerbated by the use of social media apps where seemingly flawless influencers pose in the latest fashion and in front of the most expensive cars and homes.

Even without social media, every day we make comparisons with people around us as a result of our own human nature. We compare our lives to others to gauge our success in our respective roles in society. This can be both positive and negative, according to Psychology Today, which states more than 10 per cent of our daily thoughts involve a comparison of some kind. Consider the average person thinks approximately 6,000 thoughts a day, comparison accounts for around 600 of these thoughts.

We compare ourselves to those we aspire to be like as a means of motivation, or to those we imagine we are superior than to soothe our own insecurities.

The urge to make comparisons is strong, but what are we comparing ourselves to, anyway?

In my opinion, we most often compare ourselves to an idealized or imagined version of someone else, which often stems from a perfectly curated version of their life as seen on Facebook or Instagram.

Teddy Roosevelt said, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” which suggests comparison-making can be harmful to our mental health and detract from our happiness and personal contentment.

Whether we’re comparing ourselves to others as a source of aspiration or to boost our confidence, it can sometimes be detrimental to our health.

Psychology Today asserts the best remedy is to shift your thinking from negative comparisons to positive ones. This means shifting your thinking from “the glass is half empty” to “the glass is half full.”

The easiest way to do this, in my opinion, is to adopt a mindset of gratitude. While comparison may indeed be the thief of joy, gratitude is the giver.

Social media only gives us a glimpse into other people’s lives and oftentimes we’re only seeing the highlight reel. This can give the wrong impression that other people are having more fun than you, have more friends than you, have happier home lives, and are more successful in their career than you.

Instead of focusing on improving the areas of your own life that could use some tender loving care, you can get stuck in a place of defeat.

From my experience as a late-twenty-something, it can seem like everyone is getting married, having babies, or getting promoted. It’s enough to make you downright depressed if you let it.

Your life – and especially your 20s – is about exploration and growth, and that journey looks a little different for everyone. Every person has a unique set of life circumstances and experiences that have led them to where they are now.

The point is to celebrate everyone for their differences, aspire to be better than you were yesterday, and be grateful for what you have today.

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